There is certainly a honeymoon period of excitement when sharing the news of expecting not one but two children. It feels like everywhere you turn, there is an echo of congratulations and happiness.
It was a day that nobody could take away from me. I wish I could have paused it for longer. Only if those 24 hours could be stretched out to 72. I just wanted the honeymoon to not turn the page because I knew that there would be pockets of overseers whispering questions that I could choose to hear.
The first was the obvious. Was this accidental? Ouch. It’s almost like the thought that being in your 40’s with multiple children that expanding the family is taboo. I have to tell you that I never got that memo and our intention to have another child was our plan.
We looked at the landscape of our family and saw how our daughter and two boys connected. They are his foundation.
After Sawyer, there was no other Rubin in this household. He knows what he knows and that is his love from his big sister and brother.
He will now have the luxury to love two younger siblings. He will be able to teach them things he knows. He will have the opportunity to grow with them. He will be given the opportunity to be looked up to. The thought of this was impossible to even fathom years ago when he had little words, couldn’t walk, or even showed a desire to play.
By the way Jon, what if the twins have Autism?
I’m not even flinching. Here’s my response to this.
What about Autism?
We could read every statistic about the odds of having another Autistic child or children. I haven’t studied the archives. I haven’t looked at trends. I haven’t given it any thought other than when someone asks me the question, which unfortunately some have.
The thing is that Sawyer is Autistic. It’s a part of him. It’s not his nickname nor is it his title. He is in fact my son and I love him.
We don’t make decisions over here on what if, or maybes. We make it on building a family and take on the challenges that come our way.
I don’t have all the answers but I’m not scared of the questions. Bring them on!